Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Not a People Person

This may be an odd thing to say on a blog, but I'm going to say it anyway: I am not very social. I am not what you would call a "people person". I can feel inadequate in social situations. I can be rather awkward when dealing with others. Heck, I can be downright unbearable at times! Sometimes, I wonder if this has hurt me, hindered me, gotten in the way of some of my dreams and endeavours. It probably has. However, I am beginning to accept the asocial side of my nature. It's a part of who I am.

When it comes to making meaningful connections, I'm sure my asocial nature hurts me. I have a habit of severing connections when annoyed. I burn just as many bridges as I build. Sometimes, I destroy spans even if letting them stand intact would be more beneficial to my aspirations and ambitions. I'm funny that way.

There are times I wish I was more social, more of a "people person". There are times I wish  I got along better with others. There are times I wish I was better at making meaningful connections and keeping those connections intact. However, I know I've been like this for a very long time. I know my preschool and grade school teachers made comments about how I didn't always get along well with the other children. That was thirty-five to forty years ago now. Some things never change.

Oh well, I do the best I can.I struggle along, faltering at times, but doing what I can to make a few connections and build a few bridges. I'm always hoping to stumble across a niche where my asocial nature isn't such a handicap. Am I there yet? I don't know. Perhaps. Perhaps not. If not, at least I'm closer to being there than I've ever been before.


alex-ness said...

Don't worry Richard, people who aren't very social can aim their energies at good work, rather than pointless chatter.

Richard Fay said...

Thanks, Alex!

I have had my reasons for reducing my number of friends on Facebook and cutting back on my attempts to network with writer, artists, editors, and publishers. Trying to build meaningful connections through social networks backfired on me so many times that I've pretty much given up trying. I've decided to concentrate less on networking and more on creating.

That being said, I think networking and making meaningful connections may be important in the genre writing realm. That may be one of those areas where my asocial nature works against me. I never realised how social the world of genre could be until I tried to be a part of that world. And I'm sure I make a lot of missteps! I butted heads with more than one writer. That's probably not the best way to make friends in the industry.